Mirror Mirror on the wall

I have a love hate relationship with food and my bathroom scale. I just love to hate it!

I have always been skinny, my weight since high school was always 55kg. The year after school I started gaining weight and developed Bulimia because I just could not handle the fact that I am getting “fat”, when I met my husband, he soon helped me overcome that dreadful disease, he is absolutely amazing,  on my worst day he will still make me feel like the most beautiful and sexy woman alive.

In pregnancy I gained about 20kg, with each, but lost the extra weight very soon after I had my babies. I was on anti-depressants for a very long time, and I am sure that caused my weight to slowly but surely climb, eventually I realised I have gained 10kg’s!

With lots of tears and self hate I decided its time to do something and get my body back. I decided to give  running a shot, because I am really not a gym person (I have tried), at first it was terrible, I battled, but I kept pushing myself. Eventually after a very long time I started to really enjoy myself, and lost 6kg’s. That sealed the deal. And I could still enjoy my glass of wine and choccies when I feel like it. I still have a very unhealthy approach to food in general, and try so hard not to say anything negative about my weight and myself when my daughter is near. I want her to realise she is beautiful just the way she is.

I tell my kids this everyday: “You are kind, you are smart, you are beautiful.” I hope that it goes deep into their foundation, and they always know that they are special and amazing. Self hate it the worst thing ever. I hope someday I will also believe it when my husband tells me, you are kind, you are smart and you are beautiful!

Body shaming is never ok, skinny or fat, obese or anorexic. We all have our own demons to fight. Sometimes we are already hard on ourselves. Without anyone knowing. Let’s just love and respect one another. Always remember, you are amazing, you are beautiful, you are smart and you are kind.

Peace and love till we chat again.







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